雙語(yǔ)閱讀：用選狗方式擇偶兩者有很多相似之處

　　摘要：你是不是一直選錯(cuò)男人卻擁有著一只最完美的寵物?那么這個(gè)戀愛建議可能就是為你準(zhǔn)備的。

　　Do you always go for the wrong men, but have the most perfect pet? Then this relationshipadvice may be for you。

　　A leading love expert has suggested there are parallels between picking the perfect partner andthe way you choose your dog。

　　你是不是一直選錯(cuò)男人卻擁有著一只最完美的寵物?那么這個(gè)戀愛建議可能就是為你準(zhǔn)備的。

　　一個(gè)前沿愛情專家表示，選擇一個(gè)完美伴侶的方式和你選狗方式有很多相似之處。

　　Author and relationship coach Dr Annie Kaszina Ph.D - who is the first to admit she has herown chequered relationship history - discovered that by applying these principles she couldfinally make the right choices。

　　作家兼戀愛教練安妮·卡斯楠博士是第一個(gè)承認(rèn)自己有過糟糕愛情史的相關(guān)專家。她發(fā)現(xiàn)通過運(yùn)用這些原則，她終于可以做出正確的選擇了。

　　When Annie met Orlandino it was love at first sight: the big brown eyes, the irresistible looks,the knack he had of making her laugh。

　　安妮與奧蘭蒂諾相遇的時(shí)候可謂是一見鐘情：大大的棕色眼睛，魅力十足的長(zhǎng)相，有讓她呵呵大笑的本領(lǐng)。

用選狗方式擇偶 兩者有很多相似之處

　　But sadly, he wasn't a keeper. Beneath that charming exterior lay some unsavoury habits anda difficult and a very demanding personality. Orlandino was the dog from hell。

　　但遺憾的是，他不值得她與之廝守。在他那迷人的外表下隱藏著一些令人討厭的習(xí)慣和令人難以相處，很強(qiáng)勢(shì)的性格。奧蘭蒂諾就像一只地獄犬。

　　What Annie learned from that encounter set her on the path to becoming a women'srelationship coach。

　　安妮在那次戀愛經(jīng)歷中吸取的教訓(xùn)讓她走上了成為一名女性戀愛專家的道路。

　　She learned her lesson, chose her second dog - and her current lovely partner - with a lotmore care, and has since taught hundreds of women simple ways to spot the right man forthem, using her pet as the template。

　　她吸取了教訓(xùn)，更加謹(jǐn)慎小心地給自己挑了第二只狗，也就是她現(xiàn)在的情人。從此以后她把自己的寵物作為范例，教給了幾百位女性簡(jiǎn)單找到她們另一半的方法。

　　Now Annie shares ten of her tips with Femail readers, inspired by her new book, entitled DoYou Choose Your Dog More Carefully Than Your Husband?, which comes out on Valentine'sDay。

　　現(xiàn)在安妮把她在新書《你在選狗時(shí)比你在選丈夫時(shí)更仔細(xì)嗎?》中所體會(huì)的10個(gè)小竅門分享給Femail欄目讀者。這本書將在情人節(jié)發(fā)行。

　　1. Temperament is king

　　性格是最重要的

　　Mean, moody, and magnificent may sound exciting… So, too, may the idea of taking on achallenge, or 'taming' someone 'wild'。

　　吝嗇，情緒化，氣宇軒昂等性格特征可能聽起來讓人很興奮。讓人想要接受挑戰(zhàn)，馴服“野獸”。

　　Unfortunately, they lead to hard work relationships; and hard work relationships lead toemotional exhaustion and breakdown。

　　不幸的是，這會(huì)導(dǎo)致艱難的戀愛關(guān)系;艱難的戀愛關(guān)系會(huì)導(dǎo)致情感衰竭以及精神崩潰。

　　Better to look for someone sunny and sweet-natured。

　　最好是找個(gè)陽(yáng)光的，脾氣好的。

　　Think about the way a date projects himself on first meeting and beyond. Why wouldpessimism or negativity be an aphrodisiac?

　　想想看約會(huì)對(duì)象在第一次見面和之后的日子里舉手投足的方式。一個(gè)悲觀消極，充滿負(fù)能量的人怎么會(huì)催發(fā)你的情欲呢?

　　2. Check the pedigree

　　查一查家庭背景

　　Obviously, this is simpler with dogs than it is with people, and can't be settled on a first date.But then Rome wasn't built in a day, and nor should relationships be。

　　通常而言，挑人不像挑狗那么簡(jiǎn)單，可以第一次見面就下決定。但是羅馬不是一天建成的，戀愛關(guān)系也不是。

　　You can listen to the way they talk about parents, family members, and friends。

　　你可以聽聽他們討論父母，家庭成員，和朋友的方式。

　　If they come across as Billy-no-mates, there is cause for concern。

　　如果他們恰巧沒什么朋友，那你就要引起注意了。

　　3. Beware yappiness

　　讓自己開心

　　Unless you're okay with saddling yourself with Mr I'm Great, Mr Alpha Male, Mr In Love With TheSound of His Own Voice, or Mr Life and Soul of the Party, be careful of over-talkers。

　　除非你愿意和自大，大男子主義，自吹自戀，派對(duì)霸王這樣的男人在一起，不然就要當(dāng)心那些自吹自擂的人了。

　　Incessant talking on a first date may be a sign of nerves, but also a lack of interest in the otherperson and a lack of social skills。

　　第一次約會(huì)就很話嘮可能是緊張的表現(xiàn)，但也是對(duì)對(duì)方缺乏興趣和交際能力差的表現(xiàn)。

　　They need to take an interest in you too (This holds just as true for Strong, Silent Types)。

　　他們也要對(duì)你感興趣(這同樣對(duì)悶騷型的男人也適用。)

　　Asking non-intrusive questions is not rocket science。

　　問一些不具有侵犯性的問題不是個(gè)復(fù)雜的事情。

　　4. Good manners

　　有禮貌

　　This goes without saying. But it's not limited to table manners。

　　這是不言而喻的。但也不止于餐桌禮儀。

　　Snarliness towards waiters, children, and anyone outside the charmed circle of you and yourdate is a bad sign of things to come。

　　對(duì)服務(wù)員，孩子和任何其他在你倆二人世界之外的人糾纏不清是個(gè)不好的現(xiàn)象。

　　Selective good manners actually suggest that those manners are not deeply ingrained and maysoon melt away。

　　過于講究好禮貌事實(shí)上表明了這些禮貌并不是根深蒂固的，可能很快就沒有了。

　　5. Over-exuberance

　　精力過度旺盛

　　Pushy does not mean keen. It means pushy。

　　強(qiáng)勢(shì)并不意味著他特別喜歡你，強(qiáng)勢(shì)就是強(qiáng)勢(shì)。

　　First date pushiness is the sign of someone who doesn't respect boundaries and will end uppushing you into emotional corners。

　　第一次約會(huì)就表現(xiàn)的咄咄逼人意味著他并不尊重彼此的界限，結(jié)果會(huì)把你推向情感的死角。

　　6. Good behavior

　　舉止得體

　　Many a woman who has overlooked a little first date leering - at other women - has lived to ruethe day。

　　很多女人忽視了第一次約會(huì)對(duì)其他女性拋媚眼的重要性，之后都悔不當(dāng)初。

　　You have standards for how you would dress and behave on a first date. Your date should,too。

　　你有第一次約會(huì)自己穿衣和舉止得體的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)。你的約會(huì)對(duì)象也應(yīng)該有這樣的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)。

　　If your date's behaviour violates your standards in any way that's a clear sign that you could bein for a rough ride。

　　如果你的約會(huì)對(duì)象的舉止違反了你的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，不論怎樣那就很明顯意味著你之后的約會(huì)會(huì)舉步維艱。

　　7. Docility

　　溫順

　　You want your date to be sensitive and responsive to your wishes。

　　你想讓你的約會(huì)變得和你所想的一樣心思細(xì)密，符合你的心愿。

　　Choosing your meal for you, unasked, or making decisions for you without consulting you is aclear sign of wanting to be top dog。

　　沒有問你，就為你選好了食物;沒有問你，就為你做好了決定，這些都很明顯表現(xiàn)出他想主導(dǎo)這個(gè)約會(huì)。

　　Do you want to be reduced to playing Bottom Dog?

　　你想被逼到只能當(dāng)敗犬嗎?

　　8. Playfulness

　　活潑快樂

　　You want someone not just to have fun with, but someone who's fun to be around。

　　你想要的不僅僅是一個(gè)能夠一起愉快的玩耍的人，更應(yīng)該是一個(gè)能讓你在他身邊感到快樂的人。

　　That doesn't necessarily mean someone who acts like a kid - what long-term kids are actuallylooking for is second mummies. You want someone who you feel comfortable enough around tobe silly with。

　　這并不一定意味著某人表現(xiàn)的很像個(gè)孩子，那些長(zhǎng)不大的“孩子”想要的是第二個(gè)媽媽。你想要一個(gè)讓你感覺很舒服的人，和他在一起又感覺傻乎乎的。

　　9. Beware rogue breeders

　　小心流氓的飼養(yǎng)員

　　If you've been single for a while, friends may take it upon themselves to set you up with 'lovelydates'。

　　如果你長(zhǎng)時(shí)間單身，你的朋友們就會(huì)擔(dān)負(fù)起幫你制造約會(huì)的的責(zé)任。

　　Just because they find that date 'lovely' in the context in which they know them doesn't meanyou will。

　　他們從他們自身來觀察，覺得這場(chǎng)約會(huì)將會(huì)十分美好，但這并不意味著你也會(huì)感同身受。

　　You wouldn't buy a house just on the say-so of Mrs Bloggs three doors down。

　　你不會(huì)因?yàn)槟橙说娜詢烧Z(yǔ)就去買個(gè)房子。

　　You always have to do your own due diligence。

　　你必須要做好你自己應(yīng)做的準(zhǔn)備。

　　10. Leave the paperwork at home

　　把紙上談兵拋之腦后

　　Women are terrible at playing 'Fantasy Future' - they go on a first date and, provided the manisn't an obvious freak or psychopathic monster, they get busy imagining their future life withthat person。

　　女人幻想未來的能力很差。她們?cè)诘谝淮渭s會(huì)就幻想著她們和那個(gè)人的未來生活，假設(shè)這個(gè)男人不是個(gè)怪胎或心理變態(tài)。

　　A first date is not designed to be a marriage contract. It's simply the start of getting to knowanother person。

　　第一次約會(huì)并以一定會(huì)通向一場(chǎng)婚禮。而只是了解一個(gè)人的開始。

　　If you find yourself fantasising about that happy future, take a cold shower, or speak to agrounded friend。

　　如果你發(fā)現(xiàn)自己在幻想美好的未來，那就去洗個(gè)冷水澡，或者找個(gè)講道理的好朋友談?wù)劇?/p>