經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀
冷笑話的主要應(yīng)用群體是熟悉網(wǎng)絡(luò)的平民、青年、學(xué)生、白領(lǐng)等,他們具備熟練的網(wǎng)絡(luò)技能、很強(qiáng)的接受新事物的能力以及開拓創(chuàng)新的精神。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來的經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀，歡迎閱讀!
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀篇一
Halfway between New York City and Washington, D.C.,]the train's engine fell silent.
在紐約至華盛頓的半路上，火車的引擎突然沒聲兒了。
"I've got good news and bad news," the conductor announced.
“我有好消息和壞消息宣布”列車長(zhǎng)通過廣播說。
"The bad news is we lost power."My fellow passengers groaned.
“壞消息是我們失去動(dòng)力了” 同車的乘客們不禁抱怨了起來。
"The good news,"he added, "is we weren't cruising at 30,000 feet."
“至于好消息”，他補(bǔ)充說，“是我們沒有在3萬英尺上巡航”。
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀篇二
He loves chocolate chip cookies 他愛吃巧克力塊曲奇
An old man was laying on his death bed.
老人躺在床上，
He had only hours to live when he suddenly smelled chocolate chip cookies.
只能再活幾個(gè)小時(shí)了。突然，他聞到了巧克力塊曲奇的味道，
He loved chocolate chip cookies more than anything else in the world.
他最愛吃這種餅干了。
With his last bit of energy, he pulled himself out of bed, across the floor, and to the stairs.
用他最后一點(diǎn)力氣，老人翻下床，爬到樓梯那，下樓到了廚房。
Then down the stairs and into the kitchen. There his wife was baking chocolate chip cookies.
他老伴正在做巧克力塊曲奇。
As he reached for one, he got SMACKED across the back of his hand by the wooden spoon his wife was holding.
他拿了一塊，這時(shí)手背被他老伴用木勺打了一下，
"Leave them alone!" she said, "They're for the funeral!"
“放下，”她說，“這是葬禮上用的!”
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀篇三
Honest?誠(chéng)實(shí)嗎
Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day.
在動(dòng)物園，我無意中聽到兩個(gè)學(xué)齡前的小男孩在聊天。
"My name is Billy. What's yours?" asked the first boy. "Tommy," replied the second.
“我叫Billy。你叫什么名字?” 一個(gè)男孩問題。“Tommy”，另一個(gè)男孩回答。
"My Daddy's an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy.
“我爸爸是一位會(huì)計(jì)師，你爸爸是做什么的?”Billy問Tommy。
Tommy replied, "My Daddy's a lawyer." "Honest?" asked Billy.
“我爸爸是一位律師，”Tommy回答。“真的嗎?”Billy問。
"No, just the regular kind", replied Tommy.
“不是啦，就跟別的律師一樣。”Tommy回答。
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀篇四
How could a Chihuahua kill a Rottweiler?吉娃娃怎么可能會(huì)要了羅特韋爾的命
A man walks into a bar one day and asks,"Does anyone here own that Rottweiler outside?"
一個(gè)男人走進(jìn)酒吧問，“外面那條羅特韋爾狗是誰(shuí)的?”
"Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?"
“我的，” 一個(gè)騎摩托車的男人站起來說，“怎么了?”
";Well, I think my Chihuahua just killed him""What are you talkin' about?!"the biker says, disbelievingly.
“哦，我想我的吉娃娃剛要了它的命……”“你在說什么啊?”騎摩托的人覺得難以置信，
"How could your little runt kill my Rottweiler?""Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!"
說，“就憑你那只小不點(diǎn)，怎么可能殺得了我的羅特韋爾狗?”“哦，它卡在你的狗的喉嚨里了。”
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀篇五
If Life Were Like A Computer 假如生活是一臺(tái)電腦
You could add/remove someone in your life using the control panel.
你可以通過控制面板增加或者刪除一些人;
You could put your kids in the recycle bin and restore them when you feel like it!
可以把孩子放進(jìn)回收站，然后在你喜歡的時(shí)候再還原。
You could improve your appearance by adjusting the display settings.
可以通過調(diào)整顯示器的設(shè)置讓外表更好看;
You could turn off the speakers when life gets too noisy.
可以在吵鬧的時(shí)候關(guān)掉音箱;
You could click on “find” (Ctrl, F) to recover your lost remote control and car keys.
可以點(diǎn)擊“搜索”找到丟失了的遙控器和車鑰匙;
To get your daily exercise, just click on "run"!
鍛煉身體的時(shí)候，點(diǎn)擊“運(yùn)行”。
If you mess up your life, you could always press "Ctrl, Alt, Delete" and start all over!
要是你的生活一團(tuán)糟，同時(shí)按下“ctrl, alt, delete”鍵，一切重新開始。
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