1分鐘好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話
1分鐘好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話
笑話能反映出一個(gè)民族的價(jià)值系統(tǒng)及其對(duì)周圍世界肯定和否定的態(tài)度。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的1分鐘好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話，歡迎閱讀!
1分鐘好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇一
老夫老妻
A couple had been married for 50 years. "Things have really changed,” she said. "You used to sit very close to me.”
一對(duì)夫妻結(jié)婚已經(jīng)五十年了。“今非昔比啦!”她說(shuō)，過(guò)去你總是緊緊地挨著我坐。”
"Well，I can remedy that ,”he said, moving next to her on the couch.
“嗯，我可以做些補(bǔ)救，”他說(shuō)，挪到長(zhǎng)沙發(fā)上，坐在她的旁邊。
"And you used to hold me tight.”
“過(guò)去你總是緊緊地抱著我。”
"How's that?" He asked as he gave her a hug.
“怎么樣?”他擁抱了她一下，問(wèn)道。
"Do you remember you used to nudge my neck and nibble on my ear lobes?"
“你記不記得過(guò)去你總是貼近我的脖子，咬我的耳朵?’’
He jumped to his feet and left the room. "Where are you going?” she asked.
他跳起來(lái)離開(kāi)了房間。“你去哪兒?”她問(wèn)道。
"I'll be right back ,”he said, "I've got to get my teeth!”
“我馬上就回來(lái)，”他說(shuō)，“我得去取我的牙齒!”
1分鐘好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇二
迪尼斯之旅
On a trip to Disney World in Florida, my husband and I and our two children devoted us wholeheartedly to the attraction. After three exhausting days，we headed for home.
佛羅里達(dá)州的迪斯尼樂(lè)園是一個(gè)迷人的地方。一次我和丈夫以及兩個(gè)孩子前往旅游，我們?nèi)硇牡爻磷碓谒母鞣N奇觀之中。筋疲力盡地玩了三天之后，我們要回家了。
As we drove away, our son waved and said : "good bye，Mickey.”
當(dāng)我們驅(qū)車離開(kāi)時(shí)，兒子揮著手說(shuō)道:“再見(jiàn)，米奇!”
Our daughter waved and said, "goodbye, Minnie.”
女兒揮著手說(shuō)道:“再見(jiàn)，美妮。”
My husband waved, rather weakly，and said : "goodbye , money.”
丈夫也有氣無(wú)力地?fù)]了揮手，說(shuō)道:“再見(jiàn)，美元。”
1分鐘好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇三
誰(shuí)死的更慘
Three stood by the golden gate and St. Peter said，St. Peter said, “sorry，we' re all filled up, so only one of you can come into heaven. So, out of you three, the one who had the most tragic death of all may enter the heaven.”
三個(gè)男人站在天堂門外，圣彼得說(shuō):“對(duì)不起，我們這里已經(jīng)人滿為患你們中只有一個(gè)人能夠進(jìn)人天堂。所以，你們?nèi)齻€(gè)人當(dāng)中死得最慘的那個(gè)才能進(jìn)入。”
The first man spoke, "well，I am a newlywed and I tend to get jealous of my wife and her male friends, so I forbid her to see any of them when I was at work. But today I came home early and saw two wine glasses on the coffee table and when I asked my wife what was going on, she blushed and was silent. I searched the entire house for her male friend and finally I spotted someone’s hands grasping the railing on our balcony. In a fit of rage I stomped on the hands until the rascal fell 15 stories down into the bin below. When I realized he was still alive, I unhooked my fridge and throw it over the railing. In the process of doing this, I had a heart attack.”
第一個(gè)人說(shuō):“我剛結(jié)婚不久，很嫉妒我的妻子和他的男性朋友，所以在我上班的時(shí)候，我禁止她見(jiàn)任何的男性朋友。但是今天我回家較早，看見(jiàn)咖啡桌上放著兩個(gè)葡萄酒杯，當(dāng)我問(wèn)妻子發(fā)生了什么事情的時(shí)候，她紅著臉不說(shuō)話。我搜遍了整個(gè)屋子想找出那個(gè)男人，最后發(fā)現(xiàn)有個(gè)人的手抓住了我家
涼臺(tái)的欄桿。我對(duì)著那雙手就是一陣狂踢，直到那個(gè)流氓從十五樓上掉下去，可惜下面正好有一堆紙箱，當(dāng)我得知他還活著時(shí)，就搬起家里的冰箱從陽(yáng)臺(tái)上向下砸去，然后就突發(fā)心臟病身亡。”
St. Peter replied, "wow, that's too bad. Next?"
圣彼得說(shuō):“噢，夠慘的。下一個(gè)?”
The second man began to speak，` I am a window washer and I was minding my own business and washing the seventeenth story windows at an apartment when my safety rope snapped and I began to fa11.I reached out and in a stroke of luck on to a balcony railing on the fifteenth. I was trying to catch my breath and wait it for someone to rescue me when some lunatic started to stomp on my hands until I lost my grip and fell into the bin below. I opened my eye in disbelief only to see a fridge come crashing down onto my head.”
第二個(gè)人說(shuō):“我是一個(gè)窗戶清潔工，一天我正在清洗公寓十七樓的窗戶，安全帶不幸突然崩斷，我開(kāi)始?jí)嬄?，但幸運(yùn)的是我抓住了十五樓陽(yáng)臺(tái)的欄桿，我屏住了呼吸等著人來(lái)救我，突然有個(gè)神經(jīng)病人亂踢我的手，直到我失手掉進(jìn)下面的一堆紙箱。我睜開(kāi)眼睛一看，一個(gè)冰箱正朝我的頭上砸來(lái)。”
St. Peter replied: "my, my. . . that is bad. Next?"
圣彼得說(shuō):“哎喲，……夠慘的。下一個(gè)?”
The third man spoke last, "well, I was hiding in the fridge when. . .”
第三個(gè)最后說(shuō):“哎，我當(dāng)時(shí)正藏在冰箱里，突然……”
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