關于特別好笑的英語笑話
近些年,冷笑話作為一種特殊的幽默方式在互聯(lián)網(wǎng)、電視節(jié)目、書籍雜志上廣泛流傳。小編精心收集了關于特別好笑的英語笑話,供大家欣賞學習!
關于特別好笑的英語笑話:Giving you a new start 讓你重新獲得新生
One day Mark Twain read an announcement of his death in a newspaper. He hastened to the editor to protect.
"I am very sorry," the editor replied. "It's a terrible mistake, but it's too late to do much about it. The best thing I can do for you is to put you in the Birth Column tomorrow morning and give you a new start."
一天,馬克·吐溫在報上讀到一則關于他的死亡訃告。他急忙趕到編輯那兒以示抗議。
“非常抱歉,”編輯說,“這是一個可怕的錯誤,但是要彌補已為時太晚。我唯一能為您做的事情是將您刊登在明天早晨出版的廣告出生欄中,讓您重新獲得新生。”
關于特別好笑的英語笑話:She Didn't Laugh 她沒有笑
The boss was telling jokes. Everyone laughed uproariously. But a girl sitting in the corner was not amused.
"What's the matter?" complained the boss. "Haven't you got a sense of humor?" The girl said, "Oh, don't have to laugh, as I'm leaving tomorrow."
老板在講笑話,大家都在哈哈大笑,可是坐在角落里的一個姑娘沒有被逗樂。
老板不滿地說:“怎么啦?你就沒有一點幽默感嗎?”姑娘回答說:“哦,我不用笑,因為我明天就要離職了。”
關于特別好笑的英語笑話:How many vice presidents 副主管多著呢
Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end.
Finally she couldn't take it any longer, and told him, "Listen, it means nothing. They even have a vice president of peas at the grocery store!"
"Really?" Not sure if this was true or not, Tom decide to call the grocery store.
A clerk answers and Tom says. "Can I please talk to the Vice President of peas?"
The clerk replies. "Canned or frozen?"
湯姆被公司提拔為副主管,湯姆太興奮了,幾周以來一直在妻子面前夸耀著。
最后,妻子實在忍無可忍,就跟湯姆說:“聽著,這沒什么,雜貨店里賣豌豆的還有副主管呢!”
“真的嗎?”湯姆不確定這是真是假,于是決定打電話給雜貨店。
一個售貨員接了電話,湯姆問:“能讓管豌豆的副主管接電話嗎?”
售貨員回復:“是要負責罐裝的還是負責冷凍的副主管呢?”
關于特別好笑的英語笑話:Different idea 想法不同
A young man and his girlfriend were sitting together imagining their happy life in the future.
The young man said, "How free and happy it would be, if we were two little birds, then we could fly out into the great world and build our nest in the top of a tree."
But his girlfriend said, "I think it would be much more enjoyable to be married and to have a flat with two rooms and a toilet, a bath room, a kitchen with a gas stove and warm water."
一個小伙子和他的女朋友坐在一起,想象他們未來的幸福生活。
小伙子說:“假若我們是兩只小鳥,能飛到廣闊的天地去,把我們的窩建筑在樹頂上,那會多么自由快樂呀!”
可是她的女友說:“我認為結了婚,有一套兩室一廳的住房,有衛(wèi)生間、洗澡間和帶煤氣灶與熱水的廚房,那會更加愜意得多。”
關于特別好笑的英語笑話:The Day off from work 丈夫休息在家
My husband was enjoying the day off from work and watched me scurry about the house.
I picked up his dirty clothes, put away his work shoes, carried out his popcorn bowl from the previous night's football viewing,washed the breakfast dishes, wiped the coffee he'd spilled and ironed his shirts. Seeing a thoughtful look on his face, I wondered if he was beginning to realize just how much unnecessary work he created for me. Maybe he would offer to help. "A penny for your thoughts," I said.
"I was thinking," he replied, "that one of the things I like best about you is how you always find ways to keep yourself busy."
丈夫今天放假,就在家看著我忙家務活兒。
我撿起他的臟衣服,收拾好他的皮鞋,拿走前一天晚上他看橄欖球時吃過爆米花的碗,洗了盛早餐的盤子,擦干凈他濺出來的咖啡,熨好了他的襯衫??吹剿樕下冻龀了嫉谋砬椋也恢浪遣皇且庾R到他給我?guī)砹硕嗌俨槐匾龅募覄栈?。也許他會來幫忙。“你在呆呆的尋思什么呢?“我說。
“我正在想,“他回答,“我最喜歡你的一點是你總是不讓自己閑著。”
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