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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ) > 英語(yǔ)閱讀 > 英語(yǔ)笑話(huà) > 比較搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)大全

比較搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)大全

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

比較搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)大全

  冷笑話(huà)作為一種新興的語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象,越來(lái)越受到大家的關(guān)注,尤其在網(wǎng)絡(luò)、雜志、微博、電影上十分盛行。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編分享比較搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà),希望可以幫助大家!

  比較搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà):Flying turtle

  Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground. The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts.

  Finally, the female bird turned to her mate.

  "Dear," she chirped, "I think it's time to tell him he's adopted."

  森林的深處,一只小烏龜正在往樹(shù)上爬。幾個(gè)小時(shí)后,它到達(dá)了頂端,然后跳了下去,揮舞著前腿,然后撞到了地上?;謴?fù)好了以后,它慢慢地再次開(kāi)始爬樹(shù),跳下,然后跌到地上。小烏龜一次又一次地嘗試,有兩只小鳥(niǎo)坐在樹(shù)枝上看著它這悲劇式的嘗試。

  終于,雌性小鳥(niǎo)轉(zhuǎn)向她的伴侶。

  “親愛(ài)的,”她說(shuō),“我認(rèn)為是時(shí)候告訴他他是領(lǐng)養(yǎng)來(lái)的了。”

  比較搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà):Thank Goodness

  A kid said to his dad, "Pop, my teacher asked me if I had any younger siblings who will be coming to school."

  The dad replied, "What did your teacher say when you told him you are an only child?

  The kid answered, "He said, 'Thank goodness!'"

  比較搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà):抄襲

  A friend of mine who teachs European history at Washington University in St. Louis tell aboutthe time he spotted a plagiarized term paper. He summoned the student to his office. "This isn'tyour work." he said. "Someone typed it for you straight out of the encyclopedia. "You cann'tprove that!" the student sputtered. My friend amiled and show him the paper. Circled in redwas: "Also see article on communism."

  我有個(gè)朋友在圣路易斯的華盛頓大學(xué)教歐洲歷史,他說(shuō)有一次他發(fā)現(xiàn)了一篇抄襲的學(xué)期論文。他把那個(gè)學(xué)生叫到了辦公室。“這不是你寫(xiě)的,”他說(shuō),“有人幫你從百科全書(shū)上原封不動(dòng)地打印了下來(lái)。” “你沒(méi)有證據(jù)。”那學(xué)生氣急敗壞地說(shuō)。 我朋友笑了,他把論文拿給他看。用紅筆圈出來(lái)的是:“也可參閱共產(chǎn)主義一文。”

  比較搞笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà):Lazy Manager

  懶惰的經(jīng)理

  A middle management executive has to take on some sports,by his doctor's ,

  有一位中階經(jīng)營(yíng)主管因?yàn)槁?tīng)了他的醫(yī)師指示必須要做一些運(yùn)動(dòng),

  so he decides to play tennis .

  所以他決定要打網(wǎng)球。

  After a couple of weeks his secretary asks him how he's doing

  在幾個(gè)星期之后,他韻秘書(shū)就問(wèn)他情況如何,

  "It's going fine" ,the manager says."When I am on the court and I see the ball speedingtowards me ,

  這位經(jīng)理說(shuō):“進(jìn)行得不錯(cuò),當(dāng)我在網(wǎng)球場(chǎng)上看到球快速朝著我來(lái)的時(shí)候,

  and my brain immediately says,"Back hand!To the net!Smash !Go back"

  我的腦袋就立刻說(shuō):‘反手拍!上網(wǎng)!殺球!后退! ”

  "Really?What happens then?" the secretary asks .

  秘書(shū)問(wèn)說(shuō):“真的呀,然后嚨?”

  "Then my bady says ,"Who 、 Me?Don't talk nonsense!"

  “然后我的身體說(shuō):‘誰(shuí)?我嗎?別胡說(shuō)八道了!”’

  
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