英語(yǔ)笑話大全
英語(yǔ)笑話大全
笑話是幽默的一個(gè)屬概念 ,具有幽默的一切特征。笑話是民族特有幽默的一種形式。小編精心收集了爆笑簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
爆笑簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話篇1
A Pleasant Surprise
A friend of mine had been wanting new kitchen cabinets for a long time, but her husbandinsisted they were an extravagance. She went to visit her mother for two weeks, and whenshe returned, she was overjoyed to find that beautiful new cabinets had been installed.
A few days later a neighbor came over to visit my friend. After admiring the new cabinets, theneighbor added, "All of us were so glad that the fire your husband had while you were gone wasconfined to the kitchen. "
驚喜
我朋友有很長(zhǎng)一段時(shí)間一直想在廚房添置一些廚柜，但她丈夫堅(jiān)持說(shuō)這是鋪張浪費(fèi)。她去娘家過(guò)了兩周，回到家來(lái)，發(fā)現(xiàn)廚房里新添置了漂亮的廚柜，這令她喜出望外。
幾天后，鄰居來(lái)拜訪我朋友。欣賞了新廚柜后，鄰居說(shuō)：“你不在家的時(shí)候，你丈夫弄失了火。我們都深感慶幸只是廚房遭了殃。”
爆笑簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話篇2
An Adult Decision
The year before my son turned 18, he constantly pleaded to be allowed to a tattoo, but Irefused to sign permission for one. He argued that soon he would be a man and he should beable to make adult decisions. Sure enough, a few days after his 18th birthday, he come homewith a tattoo. Although I was not happy about this, I was curious to see what symbol ofmasculinity he had chosen. There, on his shoulder, was a two-inch image of Mickey Mouse.
成年人的抉擇
我兒子十八歲前的那一年，他常常向我提出準(zhǔn)許他文身。但我拒絕允許他這樣做。他爭(zhēng)辯說(shuō)他不久就要成為男子漢了，并說(shuō)他應(yīng)該能夠作出成年人的抉擇了。果然，十八歲生日的幾天后，他文了身，回到家里。盡管我對(duì)此感到不高興，但出于好奇，我想看看他選擇了什么雄性象征物。原來(lái)是他在肩上文了一個(gè)兩英寸長(zhǎng)的米老鼠像。
爆笑簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話篇3
You're Not Going to Make it
Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physicianmotioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway.
"Your husband is very sick, " the doctor said, "but there are three things you can do toensure his survival. First, fix him three healthful, delicious meals a day. Next, give him astress-free environment , and don't complain about anything. Finally, make passionate loveto him every day.
On the drive home the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?"
"I'm sorry, " she said, "but you're not going to make it."
你活不成了
一個(gè)人得了重病，妻子伴隨他去看醫(yī)生。檢查過(guò)后，醫(yī)生示意病人的妻子到走廊見他。
“你丈夫病得很重，”醫(yī)生說(shuō)，“但有三件事可保住他的性命。第一，一日三餐，要營(yíng)養(yǎng)美味。第二，給他一個(gè)輕松的環(huán)境，不要抱怨。第三，每天都對(duì)他傾注熾熱的愛。”
在驅(qū)車回家的路上，丈夫問(wèn)道：“醫(yī)生說(shuō)了什么?”
“很遺憾，”妻子說(shuō)，“你活不成了。”
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