經(jīng)典的簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)小笑話
有時(shí)候看一些英語(yǔ)笑話也可以令自己笑一笑哦。今天小編就給大家分享一下英語(yǔ)的笑話，歡迎大家借鑒
視力訓(xùn)練
the squad were having "visual training". one smart recruit was asked by the officer to count how many men composed a digging party in a distant field. the party was so faraway that the men appeared as mere dots, but unhesitatingly the recruit replied：
班里正在進(jìn)行“視力訓(xùn)練”。一個(gè)聰明伶俐的新兵被班長(zhǎng)叫出來(lái)數(shù)遠(yuǎn)處曠野上采掘隊(duì)的人數(shù)。采掘隊(duì)在很遠(yuǎn)的地方，那些人看起來(lái)只是一些小點(diǎn)兒。但是這個(gè)新兵毫不猶豫地回答。
"sixteen men and a sergeant , sir."
“十六個(gè)兵外加一個(gè)中士，長(zhǎng)官。”
"right, but how do you know there's a sergeant there?"
“正確，可是你怎么知道那兒有一個(gè)中士?”
"he's not doing any digging, sir."
“他不干活，長(zhǎng)官。”
絕妙的技巧
after friends of mine landed at busy newwark airport, they were unable to attract the attention of any porters to help with their luggage. in desperation, the husband took out a five-dollar bill and waved it above the crowd.
我的朋友們?cè)诜泵Φ募~瓦克機(jī)場(chǎng)著陸后，他們卻不能招呼到腳夫來(lái)幫他們搬行李。無(wú)奈，丈夫拿出一張五美元的鈔票在人群上面搖晃。
in an instant, a skycap was at his side. sir, observed the porter, you certainly have excellent communication skills.
一個(gè)帶寬邊帽的人馬上來(lái)到他身邊。“先生，”腳夫說(shuō)道，“很明顯你有絕妙的交際技巧。”
他什么都沒(méi)聽(tīng)到
Working at the post office, I'm used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What's the trouble?" "I went out this morning," she began, "and when I came home I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. My husband was in all morning. He never heard a thing!" After apologizing, I got her parcel. "Oh, good," she gushed. "We've been waiting for this for ages." "What is it?" I asked. "My husband's new hearing aid."
我在郵局上班，對(duì)于顧客們的各種情緒早已習(xí)以為常了。所以，有一天當(dāng)一個(gè)生氣的顧客氣沖沖地來(lái)到我的工作臺(tái)時(shí)，我還是非常平靜地問(wèn)她，“有什么問(wèn)題嗎?”“我早上上街了，”女顧客說(shuō)，“我回到家的時(shí)候，我看到一個(gè)卡片，卡片說(shuō)郵遞員要給我們家送包裹，但沒(méi)人在家?？墒俏业恼煞蛘麄€(gè)早上都在家啊。他說(shuō)他什么都沒(méi)聽(tīng)到”。在表示了歉意之后，我把包裹給了她。“噢，太好了”，那位女顧客喜形于色。“我們等這東西都等多少年了!”“是什么好東西?”我問(wèn)。“我丈夫的新助聽(tīng)器”。
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