放松心情英語(yǔ)幽默故事

　　在日常繁忙的生活中，也不要忘了放松自己的心情。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)放松心情英語(yǔ)幽默故事，希望大家喜歡!

　　放松心情英語(yǔ)幽默故事：聰明的目擊人

　　A witness to an automobile accident was testifying.

　　有一名車禍目擊證人正在出庭作證。

　　The lawyer asked him,"Did you actually see theaccident?"

　　律師問他：“你確實(shí)看見了這起車禍嗎?”

　　The witness:"Yes,sir."

　　目擊證人說(shuō)：“是的， 長(zhǎng)官."

　　The lawyer :"How far away were you when the accident happened?"

　　律師說(shuō)：“當(dāng)車禍發(fā)生的時(shí)候，你在多遠(yuǎn)的地方?”

　　The witness:"Thirty-one feet,six and one quarter inches."

　　目擊證人說(shuō)：“三十一英尺，六又四分之一 英尺。”

　　The lawyer(thinking he'd trap the witness):"Well ,sir,will you please tell the jury how you knew it was exactly that distance?"

　　這名律師說(shuō)(心想他會(huì)讓這務(wù)目擊證人陷，入陰謀的勘計(jì)之中)：“那好吧，先生，請(qǐng)你告訴陪審團(tuán)，你怎么知道確實(shí)是那個(gè)距離昵?”

　　The witness:"Because when the accident happened I took out a tape and measured it.I knew some annoying lawyer would ask me that silly question."

　　目擊證人說(shuō):“因?yàn)楫?dāng)車禍發(fā)生的時(shí)候，就拿出了卷盡測(cè)量過宦。我早知道會(huì)莉一個(gè)令人傷腦筋.律師問。我那個(gè)蠢問題 。”

　　放松心情英語(yǔ)幽默故事：接聽熨斗

　　A guy walks into his office ,and both of his ears are all bandaged up.

　　有一個(gè)人走進(jìn)他的辦公室，他的兩個(gè)耳朵都包扎了繃帶。

　　The boss says,"What happened to your ears?"

　　老板說(shuō)：“你的耳朵怎么啦?”

　　He says,"Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang!I accidentally answered the iron.

　　他說(shuō)：“昨天電話響的時(shí)候，我正在用熨斗燙襯衫。我竟然無(wú)意閭就把熨斗拿來(lái)接聽。

　　The boss says,"Well,that expains one ear,but what happened to your other ear?"

　　老板說(shuō)：“ 嗯，好吧，那解釋了一個(gè)耳朵，可是你的另一個(gè)耳朵又是怎么一回事呀?”

　　He says,"Well,jeez,I had to call the doctor!"

　　他說(shuō)：“嗯，哎呀!我得打電給醫(yī)生嘛!”

　　放松心情英語(yǔ)幽默故事：糟糕的上班日

　　A man joined a big multinational company as a trainee.

　　有一名男子加入一家大型跨國(guó)。公司接受訓(xùn)練。

　　On his first day at work,he dialed the pantry and shouted into the phone,

　　在他上班的第一天，他撥電話到餐飲室，并且，對(duì)著電話大聲喊!

　　"Get me a coffee quickly!"

　　“ 快點(diǎn)給我送杯咖啡過來(lái)!”

　　The voice from the other side responded,

　　電話另外-端的聲音卻響應(yīng)說(shuō):

　　"You fool you have dialed the wrong extension!Do you know who you are talking to,dumbo?"

　　“你這個(gè)笨蛋，你撥錯(cuò)分機(jī)了!蠢蛋，你知道你在跟誰(shuí)說(shuō)話嗎?”這名受訓(xùn)的人回答說(shuō)，

　　"No,"replied the trainee.

　　“不知道。”“你這個(gè)笨蛋，我是公司的總經(jīng)理。”

　　The man shouted back immediately,

　　這名男子立刻大聲吼回去：

　　"And do you know who you are talking to,you fool?"

　　“你這個(gè)笨蛋，你知道你在跟誰(shuí)說(shuō)話嗎?…總經(jīng)理回答：

　　"No,replied the General Manager.

　　“不知道。”這名受訓(xùn) 的人周答說(shuō)：

　　"Good !",replied the trainee and then put down the phone!

　　“很好!”，然后就把電話給掛了。