簡(jiǎn)單兒童英語(yǔ)小笑話
英國(guó)人有他們獨(dú)特的英式幽默，他們流傳的英語(yǔ)笑話讓人會(huì)心一笑，下面小編今天就給大家分享一下英語(yǔ)的笑話給大家看看，希望大家能開(kāi)心開(kāi)心
How to be like a gentleman
Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.
The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, "Now here's a knife, Dick. Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like a gentleman."
"Like a gentleman?" Dick asked. "How do gentlemen do it?"
"They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.
"Oh" said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,"Cut this cake in half, Catherine.".
迪克年齡七歲，他的妹妹凱瑟琳五歲。一天，媽媽把他們帶到姨媽家去玩，自己就到大城市去買些新的衣服。
孩子們玩了個(gè)把小時(shí)，在四點(diǎn)半的時(shí)候，姨媽領(lǐng)著迪克走進(jìn)了廚房。她交給迪克一塊精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，并對(duì)他說(shuō)：“喏，迪克，給你刀子，把這塊蛋糕一切為二，給你妹妹一塊。不過(guò)，你得記住要做得像一個(gè)紳士那樣。”
迪克問(wèn)：“像一個(gè)紳士?紳士怎樣做呢?”
他姨媽馬上回答說(shuō)：“紳士總是把大的一塊讓給別人的。”
迪克說(shuō)了一聲“噢”。他對(duì)此想了一會(huì)，然后，他把蛋糕拿給妹妹，并對(duì)她說(shuō)：“凱瑟琳，你來(lái)把這塊蛋糕一切為二吧。”
他的錯(cuò)
Billy:Mother,Bobbybrokeawindow.Mother:Howdidhedoit?Billy:Ithrewarockathimandheducked.比利：媽媽，波比打壞了窗玻璃。媽媽：他怎么打的?比利：我向他扔石頭，他躲開(kāi)了。
Billy: Mother, Bobby broke a window.
Mother: How did he do it?
Billy: I threw a rock at him and he ducked.
比利：媽媽，波比打壞了窗玻璃。
媽媽：他怎么打的?
比利：我向他扔石頭，他躲開(kāi)了。
我知道上帝是誰(shuí)了
A boy says to her mother, Mom, is God a man or woman?
The mom thinks a while and says, Well, son, God is both man and woman.
The son is confused, so he asks, Is God black or white?
The mother replies, God is both black and white, honey.
The son, still curious, says after a while, Is God gay or straight, mommy?
The mother, getting a little worried, answers, Son, God is both gay and
straight.
The son thinks about it, and his face lights up when he thinks he finally has answered his question: Is God Michael Jackson?
兒子：媽媽，上帝是白人還是黑人?
媽媽：寶貝，上帝是白人也是黑人!
兒子：那上帝是男人還是女人?
媽媽：寶貝，上帝是男人也是女人!
兒子：哦。我知道了，上帝是邁克爾·杰克遜!
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