適合初一的好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)
笑話(huà),顧名思義,是一種通過(guò)幽默的文字或圖示來(lái)達(dá)到令人會(huì)心一笑或捧腹大笑效果的文學(xué)形式。本文是適合初一的好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà) ，希望對(duì)大家有幫助!
適合初一的好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇一
Five Hundred Times 五百遍
In the traffic court of a large mid-western city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a school teacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case in order that she might hasten on to her classes. A wild gleam came into the judge's eye. "You are a school teacher, eh?" said he. "Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. Sit down at that table and write 'I went through a red light' five hundred times."
在中西部一個(gè)大城市的交通法庭里，一位年輕女士被帶到法官面前，她由于開(kāi)車(chē)闖紅燈被開(kāi)了罰單。女士向法官解釋?zhuān)且幻麑W(xué)校老師，請(qǐng)求法官馬上處理她的案子，以便可以趕回去上課。法官眼中閃過(guò)一絲狡黠，說(shuō)道：“你是學(xué)校的老師，對(duì)嗎?女士，我馬上要實(shí)現(xiàn)我畢生的愿望了。在那張桌子旁坐下，寫(xiě)‘我開(kāi)車(chē)闖了紅燈’500遍。”
適合初一的好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇二
The Bait 把誘餌扔回海里
A man and his wife were on a holiday.Theywent for a sail. Unfortunately the wife fell overboard and was drowned. The man asked the pier-master to let him know if her body was found. Two weeks later he received a wire saying: "Body recovered yesterday covered with crabs. Send instructions." The man sent a wire back saying, "Sell crabs, send the money; reset bait."
一個(gè)男人和妻子去度假。他們乘風(fēng)出海，不幸的是妻子掉入海中淹死了。這個(gè)男人叫碼頭的負(fù)責(zé)人在妻子的尸體找到后通知他一聲。二個(gè)星期后，他接到了一份電報(bào)：“尸體已于昨日找到，上邊爬滿(mǎn)了螃蟹。請(qǐng)指示。”男人回電報(bào)說(shuō)：“賣(mài)掉螃蟹，收入?yún)R過(guò)來(lái);誘餌扔回海里。”
適合初一的好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇三
Skinny Dipping 裸泳
One day Jimmy went down to the pond for a dip, but before he could dive in he spied his teacher, Mrs. Smith, emerging from nude bathing. When Mrs. Smith saw Jimmy, she grabbed the nearest object - which happened to be an old wooden box - and held it in front of her.
"Young man, I know what you're thinking," she said.
"And I know what you're thinking," replied Jimmy. "You're thinking that box has a bottom on it!"
Jimmy去池塘游泳，他扎猛子前剛好看到了他的老師，Smith小姐，從裸泳中冒出頭來(lái)。當(dāng) Smith小姐看到Jimmy時(shí)，她趕緊抓過(guò)最近的一個(gè)物體---那碰巧是一個(gè)舊的木頭盒子，擋在自己前面，說(shuō)：“年輕人，我知道你在想什么!”“我也知道你在想什么，”Jimmy回答，“你一定以為這個(gè)盒子是有底的!”
適合初一的好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇四
Chaude and Cold 熱與冷
A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. "This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked C gave me boiling water."
"But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude - French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal."
"Wait a minute," roared the patron. "The other tap is also marked C."
"Of course," said the manager, "It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city."
蒙特利爾咖啡館的一位顧客擰開(kāi)盥洗室的水龍頭，結(jié)果被水燙傷了。“這太可惡了，”他抱怨道，“標(biāo)著C的龍頭流出的是開(kāi)水。”
“可是，先生，C代表Chaude，在法語(yǔ)里代表'熱'。如果您住在蒙特利爾的話(huà)就應(yīng)該知道這一點(diǎn)。”
“等等，”那位顧客咆哮著，“另外一個(gè)龍頭標(biāo)的也是C。”
“那當(dāng)然，”經(jīng)理說(shuō)道：“這個(gè)C代表冷。畢竟，蒙特利爾是個(gè)雙語(yǔ)城市。”
適合初一的好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇五
Chicken soup 雞湯
Joe was in the hospital and it was time for lunch. He looks at his lunch and says, "I don't like chicken soup, bring something else." The hospital worker said, "It's good for you, the doctor said you should have it." Regardless, the patient refused to eat it. That night, a patient in the room with Joe had a bad stomach pain so the nurses came in to give him an enema. By mistake, they gave the enema to Joe. The following week, when he was leaving the hospital, a new patient asked him how he liked the hospital. He told him, "Well, the hospital itself is pretty good, but they're very strict about their food. when they bring up chicken soup you better eat it, or else they'll come back in the middle of the night and shove it up your behind!"
Joe在住院，一天午餐時(shí)間，他看了看自己的飯菜，說(shuō)：“我不喜歡雞湯，拿點(diǎn)別的給我吧。”醫(yī)院的護(hù)工說(shuō)：“雞湯對(duì)您的身體有好處，醫(yī)生說(shuō)您得喝這個(gè)。” 無(wú)論如何，Joe還是不肯喝。那天晚上，和Joe同房間的一個(gè)病人得了嚴(yán)重的胃病，于是護(hù)士過(guò)來(lái)給他灌腸?？墒撬麄兏沐e(cuò)了，給Joe做了灌腸。第二個(gè)禮拜，Joe出院時(shí)，新住進(jìn)來(lái)的病人問(wèn)他覺(jué)得醫(yī)院怎么樣。Joe告訴他：“這個(gè)醫(yī)院本身是很好的，但是他們對(duì)伙食真的很?chē)?yán)格，如果他們讓你喝雞湯，你最好喝了它，不然他們會(huì)半夜過(guò)來(lái)硬是從你后面塞進(jìn)去!”
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